The Pen of the Writer Int'l

(Continued from part 3) Never force a man into marriage with you The bible recorded that Leah was not loved while Rachel was loved. This is because Jacob never desired her in the first place but he couldn’t reject her after sleeping with her. If you trap a man into marriage by any means you choose to employ (such as getting pregnant for him), you are not guaranteed a loving atmosphere in your home which is what you actually need to thrive in life. A married woman that does not enjoy love and acceptance at home may be hostile and nag at work, she will be so angry at life and struggle with low self esteem. This is because the design of a woman is relationship-based.

(Continued from part 2) HOWEVER, patience and determination will help you through this stage; removing your attention from these mundane things and focusing it on the future. Delay is not denial, your own man that will place the right value on you is on his way. Don’t forget that you mostly misuse anything you buy cheap. Compare your attitude to a pair of shoes you got for #300 and the one you got for #7,000. You know how you keep the latter away safely immediately you get back from an outing while the former could lie around in the room until you are ready. The same way a man would treat you; depending on the platform at which he meets you. Wait and keep developing yourself to become a wife, a high-calibre career woman and an asset in God’s house.

(Continued from part 1) If he truly loves you As I ruminated on the passage, I re-affirmed the great value God has placed on a woman. Lady, a man that truly loves you will place the same value on you; take it or leave it. Fourteen years of a man’s life is not a joke, and don’t forget that time is life. Jacob paid fourteen years of his life to have Rachel! Carry yourself with good self esteem and walk tall with your head up. Don’t throw yourself around any man, YOU AREN’T CHEAP. From this story, it is noteworthy that when you meet a man that truly loves you;

Sequel to the recent instruction giving to us in my church - The Dream Centre of the Life Oasis International Church - on reading a minimum of five chapters of the Bible per day so as to read the Bible through in a year, I started from the book of Genesis and on getting to chapter 29, I read the story of Jacob’s journey to Laban (his uncle), and I was amazed with some discoveries I came up with. Love determines price Although I discovered from the Bible that the gift or wage a man mostly desires is a woman[1], the price that Jacob was ready to pay in order to marry his uncle’s daughter; Rachel really wowed me. Jacob was inquired of what he wanted as wage as he continues to live with and serve Laban; a livestock farmer.

(Continued from part 3) The evening time is a time that your greatness is as little as a seed and you work so hard in order to make a great harvest out of it. My Spiritual Father is well known around the world today as a teacher of the gospel but there was a time he said God told him to read the bible through four times every year (he was then a missionary). He said he obeyed and he could see the result today [1] . Although he has the ministry gift of teaching, his obedience and diligence helped him to make a full proof of the gift [2] . He expatiated that if he had not obeyed at that time, he would probably not be operating at the level he is today because currently he is a pastor and a family man with a lot of people he is responsible for (both biologically and spiritually) who demand his time (of which I’m one!). He also has other assignments to the body of Christ, hence presently, he tries to read the bible through at least once before the year runs out [3] . Therefore, ...

(Continued from part 2) A renowned Pastor once said that some of the prison experiences of Paul were probably God-orchestrated because some of his books in the bible would not have been written if not for his imprisonment. He was too active and zealous to take the gospel round the world that he might not have had time to write those books which are blessings to the body of Christ today. They’ve really answered a lot of questions as regarding Christianity! Going to prison was not palatable to him but the books he wrote there made his name indelible today in the Christendom and a blessing to generations after him. No matter what, anything God is involved in must always end on a positive note even if the beginning seems unpleasant. Once you know you are on the path of righteousness, then be rest assured that everything will work together for your good [1] .   

(Continued from part 1) In essence, the change in the life’s circumstance of Joseph from a well secure boy to a slave was not palatable at all, no thanks to Potiphar’s wife who slandered him into prison again after all the bitter experience of leaving his father’s comfort zone. However, the prison was the last stage of his ‘evening’ because he climbed the seat of destiny from there! It seemed like his darkest moment but it was actually the eve of a new dawn. The truth of the matter is, God’s hand was behind all the unpleasant situations that befell him. No ‘evil’ happens to God’s children for fun! [1] Joseph might have probably thought that if he had known he wouldn’t have told his brothers his dreams and they wouldn’t have sold him off, but little did he know that those scenarios were for his preparation for destiny and purpose in life. 

It is commonly described by man that a combination of morning and evening makes up a whole day. However, as I was reading the first chapter of the book of Genesis, a commonly occurring phrase caught my attention, and it reads thus:                And the evening and the morning were the first day [1] .                And the evening and the morning were the second day [2] . And so on. Therefore, this tells me that with God, the arithmetic of creation is;         EVENING + MORNING = ONE DAY and not vice-versa. It is evident that this arithmetic is in contrast with other portions of the scriptures where day was mentioned before night [3] . Hence, I understood that when it concerns ‘creation’ of something that God is involved in, evening would always come before morning. How do I mean?

(Continued from part1) Hello beloved, it's not time to give up! Ensure to embrace consistent fellowship with God because the more you go to his presence, the more you are infused with grace. You probably need just a little more patience to have what you want. My spiritual father usually says: "When it seems you can't take it anymore, the devil also can't take it any longer, now it remains who will give up first" . Therefore, wear the devil out with your faith and patience. May I let you know that as God's children, our Father is always by our side in all situations. His name is JEHOVAH SHAMA; the lord that is always there. Hence, be well assured that he is there with you in that situation you are going through. He also said in the book of Isaiah 43 vs 2:

The book of Isaiah 40 vs 28-31 gave us the certainty that there will be times of discouragement (no matter how strong you are) but it also assures us of the willingness of God to strengthen us at such moments. Grace is like the grease that prevents or reduces friction between two surfaces when they rub against eachother. If you're going through a challenge without crumbling but bouncing in faith that everything will be alright, it's because you have the grace to go through it, if that grace is exhausted, that is when you will really know the heat of that challenge. 

(Continued from Part 1) However, when I thought of taking such steps, I perceived him pull my heart back, saying to me 'FLORENCE, I WANT YOU WITH ME. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN THIS'. Hmm, the devil we are dealing with is not stupid at all; he is smarter than everyone except God. I've heard of people who left God for few months and by the time they decided to return, the devil had loaded them with problems like incurable diseases, one scar or the other, etc. 

I watched a particular film few days ago and it got me thinking and appreciating God for his grace which he extended to me very early in life. In the film, a secondary school girl was dating a guy who lied to her that he resides overseas. In summary, she lied to her Principal in order to obtain a pass to leave school (as she attends a boarding school), and went away for weeks. At the end of the day, she contracted AIDS and nearly committed suicide. I began to appreciate God for saving me early in life; at about age TWELVE. As young as I was, God came for me and I'm glad I didn't reject HIS OFFER OF MERCY, otherwise, I don't know what would have become of me! I remember that after two years of becoming born again, I struggled with a particular temptation for about three years before I eventually overcame it (although I didn't know better on how to deal with it at that time). The devil fought VEHEMENTLY so that I could succumb but God upheld me; it ...

When some people meet a new person or get to a new environment, they tend to keep to themselves. Not because they're proud or unfriendly but due to shyness or fear of rejection; they just don't know how to initiate rapport. Hence before you conclude, kindly take the first step and observe if he/she will respond positively; you might probably help them to come out! Please remember this, not everybody is good at initiating a healthy rapport!!!

We go to school to be equipped for the world out there; and not necessarily to become school prefects. In the same vein, we go to church to get equipped for destiny pursuit and the realisation of our purpose in life. Hence, stop eyeing top positions in church and start focusing on what is needful, i.e. your equipping. I realised that Daniel, Ruth and Esther were not top officials in a church but they fulfilled their destiny so well that some books in the Bible were written solely about them, whereas some of the first Apostles don't have any. It's all about perception!  If you are given a position, see it as a platform for more equipping, but if you aren't, please be content, and stop murmuring. We won't all be church leaders, but we must all be God's change agents in our world.

Courtship = Fiction episode Marriage = Reality episode The more similar the two episodes, the happier the couple! Ensure to discuss your expectations, and your views on critical issues of life. Remember, assumption is the lowest form of Knowledge, therefore, don't assume on any critical matter. Discuss! Discuss!! Discuss!!! Courtship is a time for interviews; not for intercourse .

In this age of 3G/4G phones, how do you curb your children from dabbling into awkward things on the internet (e.g pornography)? You might have successfully prevented them from watching some films at home but what about access to them on YouTube via phone? Do you stay with them in school too?  It's not a matter of Do's and Don't's anymore but making them REALISE the consequence of their choices while you TEACH them God's word and PRAY for them. Solid foundation in God is the only ESCAPE ROUTE for children of nowadays!

The man/woman you married, although a christian, isn't perfect. There are various developmental stages in God, and he/she might still be working on one wrong attitude or the other. Among all the men that God created, only the first man and woman were created as grown-ups, every other human starts as a little baby and grows into adulthood, so is your spouse too. Therefore, don't have an unrealistic expectation in marriage; thinking your spouse will ALWAYS fit into your fan tasies. He/she isn't perfect, you aren't either! Even couples that are married for some years would tell you they are still adjusting to eachother everyday. Man is a complicated being whose desires, likes, dislikes, mentality, prejudices, etc. can change at anytime. You can recall that some of your likes as at few years ago aren't your likes anymore, hence, develop a large heart to accommodate the imperfection of your spouse while you help them grow. May your home be a little Heav...

(continued from part 1) I observed the same thing some years ago while in the University. The so-called spiritual brothers rarely go for the conservative sisters in their fellowship, you mostly see them chasing the glamorous and flamboyant sisters in the fellowship, and sometimes they go for such ladies that are seemingly ‘ungodly’.  I once read about a lady who went to see her pastor and complained that no man has proposed to her but she’s already of a marriageable age. The pastor asked her to go and stay outside of the church premises and look at all the ladies passing by very well for an hour and then come back to see him. She did accordingly and on getting back, the pastor asked her, ‘How many of the ladies you saw are dressed like you?’ Hmm, what a bombshell! She burst into tears and never remained the same. Don’t forget that man (both male and female) is both spirit, soul and body. If you’re truly looking out for a suitable partner, you can't afford to ...

My spiritual father (Rev. Olusola A. Areogun) preached that to get the things God has for you in life, you must do three types of work, namely; (1) Knee work (i.e prayer) (2) Mouth work (i.e confession of God’s word) (3) Leg work (i.e hardwork/diligence).  As a single guy or lady that is still looking up to God for a suitable life partner, what else are you doing to ensure this apart from praying? How’s your physical side ; your dressing, gait, breath, etc? I once heard that in a particular church, a brother; who is a medical doctor proposed to a lady and she never gave any response for a long while. The leadership of the church decided to investigate the matter only for her to declare that the brother was smelling when he came proposing.………Oops, what an error! This brother had probably prayed and ‘tore the Heavens’ before approaching the sister; only to spoil the whole thing with carelessness about his physical side. Nothing stopped him from choosing a time when ...

(Continued from part 1) I've heard some people say that having your first kiss on your wedding night is the sweetest kiss ever. I really do believe it because it's a kiss with no hold back, no guilt nor shame, a kiss with no restraint that you don't want it to lead to sexual intercourse, a kiss you do with mental, emotional, psychological and spiritual relaxation (you're just rested!) because you know you're doing the right thing at the right time with the one you love and have decided to spend the rest of your life with......how won't it be sweet? You and I know that we enjoy the food we eat while relax more than the one we eat quickly because we're rushing somewhere. Even if you've been kissing your fiance before now, you can stop today and wait until you're married. If you've never, please wait for your first kiss with earnest expectation. Those that have practised 'no kissing rule' says it is the sweetest! L...

I observed the various ways God coupled some of his daughters maritally in the Bible. For instance: Rebecca - She was unconscious but was found (Divine arrangement) . Ruth - She consciously initiated it. Esther - She saw an interest and positioned herself to be selected. Achsah - She was given out by her father.   As much as these are all from the Bible, the truth is that you can't form a doctrine on an exceptional act of God. For example, Mary the mother of Jesus had her first child without copulating but that shouldn't make any other single lady believe God for same experience. Hence to my mind, I believe the Ruth and Esther strategies are exceptional ones which if employed could devalue a lady before a man. Don't go and propose to a man or flaunt yourself before him. Men are hunters by creation but they feel overwhelmed when hunted. Preserve your dignity by staying in your place while you keep developing yourself to be your best. I believe the Rebe...

Dear single Lady, Any man that wants to sleep with you before he marries you only wants to reduce your worth! Even if he eventually marries you, he won't value you as much as he should have if he had not touched you. Protect your dignity by keeping yourself. Take it or leave it, you can't trap a man with SEX! With man, sex is not the same as LOVE, unlike ladies.  There is a permanent respect you'll earn from your man by keeping yourself. Several women complain of being spoken to anyhow by their husbands, but the truth of the matter is, 'He lost respect for you since the day you allowed him to sleep with you before your wedding. He doesn't trust you because he thinks if he could have you so cheaply, your boss at work can also succeed by employing the same tactic he employed. Hence, he sees you as a woman of a loose character'.  It does not matter if you're no more a virgin, keep yourself from now on until you get married. It's worth...

Hey Ladies, a man has not proposed until he has actually proposed. Don't be deceived by friendliness. A man can be friendly without meaning anything serious. Several ladies have had themselves to blame due to ignorance of this. Until a man says these words to you: 'WILL YOU MARRY ME?' or 'I WILL LIKE TO MARRY YOU' ,   then, he has not committed himself! If he says it in another way, ask him: 'WHAT DOES THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN?' Never assume what he says is a proposal until the word 'MARRY' is included! If you're very warm and receptive, men will naturally 'flow' towards you because they see another 'mummy' in you. However, the irony of it is that at that point, a lady's emotion gets heightened and she thinks the guy desires to start a relationship with her. This event is quite common in Higher institutions of learning. Helloooo, guard your emotion and be analytical. If he's rallying around you too of...

Sometimes when I visit Facebook, I see people post questions about whether it's right for Christians to kiss during courtship or not. Well, some may say once it isn't boldly written in the Bible, then it is not wrong, but I want us to look at this matter closely...  Actually, I'll start by asking: 'What do you want to do with another person's body fluid (i.e saliva) when you aren't married to him yet? Doesn't it seem disgusting to you?' That you're courting doesn't mean you're ONE with him already. I do understand that at heightened emotion, you might not see it that way but if you keep this slogan at the back of your mind: "I'M NOT MARRIED TO HIM UNTIL WE ARE MARRIED", it will probably help you to put things in the right perspective, and prevent you from crossing the line; no matter what your emotion says! Moreover, it's no news that a courtship did not lead to marriage. So, may I ask: If you have to ...

(Continued from part 1) Some other factors to consider (for the conventional proposal) are the place and time to propose. Ensure to choose a PLACE where the two of you can be comfortable and free to discuss at length; not a place where familiar people will be passing by frequently, because ladies are sometimes shy at such moment. Also, choose a TIME that you are really free; a time when your attention won't be needed for another important thing. You can't afford to choose a time that is like ten minutes to another of your or her appointment. What if she asks several questions that require loads of explanation? It's not a day to rush her up because you want to attend to something else; that would be TOO WRONG of you. One of the pastors in my church once narrated that the day he proposed to his wife, they ended up spending two hours discussing! Another factor is your DRESSING and ODOUR (both mouth and body). Hmm, these are very very crucial! Please d...

Sometime ago during a Sunday service, my Spiritual Mother was explaining some things about marriage & she eventually stated how my Spiritual Father proposed to her; a statement she has always promised to tell us someday. .......Wow, what an exciting moment it was in church on that day! Honestly, I have not forgot it, and probably will never do (*wink*). Most ladies, if not all, have a way they wish to be proposed to. I was discussing with some Christian ladies sometime ago and was surprised of their responses on the matter of proposal. Some of them said even if the proposal comes in the conventional way at the onset, they would like to have another proposal before the wedding, i.e; the elaborate one that will happen in a public place. I couldn't help but laugh because I wasn't expecting such response from them. Surprisingly, the one that seemed most 'spiritual' among them firstly stated that she would like a second proposal. ....Hmm, I have neve...

Once you are not restrained from sharing your testimony, please do. Telling others about the works of God in your life can wrought salvation in them and/or boost their faith in God. God stressed this severally in His word; showing His delight in proclaiming His wonderful works in our lives [1]. Sharing testimony is one of the ways to introduce God to your children as they grow up because the human mind tends to retain stories better than sermons that are full of do's and don’t's [2]. Probably this is the means through which Ruth developed her unbending, dogged and unconditional love for the God of Naomi; to serve Him even in the face of ‘no’ awaiting future in Bethlehem [3]. It is notable that people who would not listen to sermon pay attention to stories interestingly, hence, the gospel can be delivered indirectly via sharing of testimony. Give the ‘capsule’ and allow the Holyspirit to unveil the message! More so, God is the same yesterday and today, rema...

Sometime ago, my payslip was posted to me and on looking through it, I deduced three facts which I would like to share with you. Firstly, do you know that the government did not seek my consent before deducting tax from the money I WORKED for? This gave me an understanding that I shouldn’t wait to be cajoled by anyone before paying tithe in Church . God gave an instruction in His word that tithe should be paid because it is HIS. If the government exercised authority to ensure that I paid tax, then, a higher submission should be given to the instruction given by the Creator. Waiting to be cajoled shows ignorance or immaturity in the things of God! Moreover, the percentage of my income that was deducted as tax was determined by the government. It didn’t bother them whether I was comfortable with it or not, and they are unquestionable because that is the Law. Hence, I questioned that if humans like me could dictate the percentage I should pay as tax, why should I...

Have you ever dialed a familiar number only to hear another person reply you that you’ve dialed a wrong number, and after some minutes, you redialed the same number and was able to contact your desired person? I’ve found myself in this situation few times, and it can be ascribed to irregularities in network. In essence, as long as you are in this h uman body, never say you can’t go wrong in your spiritual reception as we are prone to factors that cause anomaly in spiritual ‘network’. Therefore, it is maturity to admit being wrong after light has shone on the leading you thought you had from God and it’s obvious that you were wrong. Even prophet Samuel once missed it! The Bible recorded that his words had never fallen to the ground except on the occasion of choosing king for Israel among the sons of Jesse. However, his maturity to subject his ego and admit being wrong helped him to get it right at the end of the day. In view of this, it is essential to surround y...

Don’t conclude yet on who you really are until you observe the state of your heart and/or your performance under pressure. For instance, you can’t assure me of your faithfulness on monetary issues until I’ve seen your performance under financial pressure and lack; no matter how religious you are! It’s broadly believed that every human overcomes ste aling at adulthood; whether religious or not because it’s a moral matter (all things being equal). However, it’s notable that a lot of adults still do indirectly as stealing is not only lifting of another’s property when everyone looks away. If you are mistakenly paid more than you should earn or given more change than you should receive at a store and you don’t return the excess, it’s stealing. Hence, it is remarkable that pressure reveals the real you, the stuff you are made of.   Nevertheless, you don’t have to be discouraged if you observe that you’ve not performed too well under a particular pressure as you ha...

Companionship is God’s idea; none was created to feel fulfilled in isolation! It is the gift of God if you have someone that corrects and rebukes you lovingly.......such maximises you and brings out the best in you. It is the gift of God if you can breath normally by yourself without being placed on oxygen.......I once met a woman who was on oxygen 24/7 of the week!  It is the gift of God if you have someone you can chat with or share your innermost thought with.......some have died of depression due to loneliness. It is the gift of God if there is someone to meet at home and give you a cuddle when you close at work.......it is refreshening as it helps to unwind from the day’s activities. It is the gift of God if you have someone that exhorts and affirms you.......such helps you to face life with courage and confidence. It is the gift of God if you have someone to rejoice or comfort you.......it makes the joyful moment sweeter and the sad mo...

Christians mostly talk about Jezebel and Delilah as women who did evil in d Bible, but d truth is that they also have some good traits that can be imitated. For example, Jezebel daily fed 850 prophets of Baal (1 Kings 18:19). As a daughter of Zion, how many men of God have u fed or do u intend feeding when u have d means???? It's not that men of God are hungry, God can take care of those he has truly called but d truth is that their lives are fertile g rounds, and u need ur harvest more than God needs ur seed! Read about d woman of Shunem in 2 Kings 4:8-17.  Also, Delilah truly destroyed a giant of God (Samson) but there was something she did that made her to achieve her goal (Judges 16:19). My spiritual mother (Rev (Mrs.) Areogun) would say, 'As a wife, when was d last time u put ur husband's head on ur laps to caress???? But u keep complaining that he doesn't tell u his mind'. The truth is, u can learn from d wise, d fools, d wicked, d poo...

(Continued from Part 1)   Also, you may want to say this is the church your parents attend and you have been there since you were born, infact you are the choirmaster/mistress, hence can’t leave for another church; despite being sure you don’t belong there. With due respect, may I ask you that if your father raised his family in Ghana, must you compulsorily raise yours in Ghana as well? Another person may say, this is the church my husband attends; hence this is where God wants us to be. Please have you ever asked him whether God wants him there or not? What actually informed his decision of settling in that church? The question of ‘which church to attend?’ is a critical question that must be answered correctly because that is where your portions; your own things; will be sent to. That is your registered 'home' address in heaven! My spiritual father would say, in every decision you want to make in life, first ensure you get it RIGHT, and then start getting BETTER in it...

Few months ago, I relocated to a new accommodation but both the former and the new are in the same estate; just two streets away from eachother. Few weeks before I left, I was expecting a parcel to be delivered but it delayed. Although I ought to inform the organisation (that was to send the parcel to me) of my change of address, I decided to just inform the landlady about it so that she could sign and receive it for me when it arrives. Some days after my departure, the parcel was delivered but there was none to sign for it. The courier agent met the landlady’s absence while the new tenant (who was not formerly informed) refused to sign for it; stating that he didn’t know the addressee. Consequently, the parcel was returned. When I was informed, I contacted the courier and gave them my new address; stressing that it is just two streets away but they insisted they could only deliver it to the address given, and advised that I should inform the organisation so that they could be ins...