YOU ARE NOT CHEAP (Part 2)

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(Continued from part 1)

If he truly loves you
As I ruminated on the passage, I re-affirmed the great value God has placed on a woman. Lady, a man that truly loves you will place the same value on you; take it or leave it. Fourteen years of a man’s life is not a joke, and don’t forget that time is life. Jacob paid fourteen years of his life to have Rachel! Carry yourself with good self esteem and walk tall with your head up. Don’t throw yourself around any man, YOU AREN’T CHEAP. From this story, it is noteworthy that when you meet a man that truly loves you;

*  You will not need to impress him or convince him to marry you.
*  You will not have to fight with other ladies in order to own him.
*  He won’t quit the relationship because you refused him of pre-marital sex.
*  No misunderstanding will be enough to separate him from you.
*  He will work for the survival of the courtship more than you do, so much so that your contribution to the courtship will be negligible compared to his. (Actually, who proposed to who? Hence, his contribution is expected to be more!)
*  No matter the challenge, he will be ready to weather it just to have you.

*  Nothing will be too expensive for him to buy for you once it’s within his means. Infact, you will be the one to curtail him of showering you with too many gifts. Believe me, where the heart of a man is, there his pocket is as well.
*  He will easily forgive your wrongs to him (i.e. he won’t be mean/stern to you).
*  He will do everything possible to prove to you that he is right for you, and that with him; you are safe and have a promising future.
 In summary, he will give more and demand less. One of the characteristics of love is giving as you can give without loving but you can never love without giving. This agrees with the word of God in John 3:16 which says;
‘For God SO LOVED the world
that He GAVE his ONLY begotten son…….’

Your value is delicate
In my culture, when a man wants to pay the dowry of a woman, the lady’s family would demand for all they want and the lady also does. If the lady is already pregnant before that day, the groom’s family could reduce the number of things demanded; explaining that they don’t have the means (even if they do), and the bride’s parents would accept because she’s already pregnant and they don’t want to delay so that she won’t bear the baby in their house (which is shameful). But if the lady isn’t pregnant, they could insist on having everything on the list unless they actually know that the groom’s parents don’t have the means to satisfy all.

Moreover, in ancient time, if the lady was met a virgin after the wedding, the groom’s parents would bring more gifts to the bride’s family for giving them a ‘whole’ child. This is how delicate your value is! You can’t afford to throw yourself around. Nobody wants to pay a huge price for something cheap, displayed on the floor and auctioned in the market. Can you recall the cheap price people offer for such goods? God has placed so much value on you, hence respect yourself. I understand you’ve got a gush of emotion that wants to be expressed and I know you long for a companion, you want to be loved and touched, you crave for those early morning sweet words or texts that make you daydream as you go about your daily activities, you want to feel among and don’t want to be the only one among your friends who isn’t in a relationship, you want a man that will sweep you off your feet and shower you with gifts on your birthday, you want someone that you can share your innermost thoughts with, some of your peers have lied to you that being a virgin till you get married will make your husband not to love you because of being inexperienced on bed, you feel ashamed being single at your age because all your younger cousins are married and there is so much pressure on you at home, you feel ashamed attending single ladies programme because you think you are too old for such a setting, you want to attend final-year-students’ party with a man by your side so as not to seem as a failure after spending 4-5 years in the University,…….

To be continued.........

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